"What Do I Say???"

A few days ago I saw one of my patients for a routine OB visit. I had delivered her first child a little over 2 years ago. I had noticed she came in with some papers in hand about vaccine information that she had pulled off the internet. As we finished up her visit, she looked a little nervous, and said she had a few questions about her son. She shared the information she had with me, some of the standard information about vaccinating your child, and the potential horrors one might face if they do not do so.

Ironically, this patient was the very one who opened my eyes to how much healthier my non-vaccinated pediatric patients are. She had brought her son in for his one year visit, and mentioned how wondrous someone was that he was never really sick. I mentally thumbed through the kids I had delivered over the past 2 years, and realized how profound that difference was. They really don't come in sick very often. An occasional phone call about a cold, maybe an ear infection, but certainly not the endless parade of sick visits over the first year of life which most pediatricians and family doctors are familiar with. Which inspired me to research the whole business even more, and start keeping track. When I publish these numbers, sometime soon I hope, I will be sure to give her due recognition for that epiphany!

She has been facing a lot of pressure from her family and friends because she has chosen not to vaccinate her son yet. Her family has essentially told her she is irresponsible and that her doctor is a whack job.
She broke down into tears while telling me that there are people who don't want her son in their play group because he is not vaccinated. And then she is also scared about having her son exposed to others because he is not vaccinated, and could run the risk of getting sick.

Wow...

I sat there and listened, growing sadder by the second. What on earth do I say? What on earth do I do?
For all intents and purposes at this point in time I AM the whackjob. I have chosen to challenge one of the pillars of not only our society, but of modern medicine.

Do I give in and start an abbreviated vaccine schedule? Do I just tell her to lie to other people? From what do I ask her to draw the strength to continue to do the right thing in the face of such pressure?

As it happened, I had been invited to give a talk about the safety of vaccines at a local chiropractors office a couple of days later, and she was able to attend. This chiropractor has 9 children, none of whom have been vaccinated, and has run the gamut of childhood illnesses with them, including measles. She was able to talk to him as well as other parents who have opted down the same road. I think I saw a bit of relief on her face by the end of the evening, and likewise I think I too felt better.

This patient had unknowingly led me to a second epiphany. Here is part of an email I sent her:

You also made me realize, when you came in a couple of days ago, how much pressure someone can get for making such a decision. How tough that decision can be. That I need to really prepare parents with tons of info...
I went into medicine to be a healer...part of our oath on graduating is "First, do no harm", which I take very seriously. I also take personal choice very seriously, so whatever the decision might be, I will respect that.

I went on to list a few of the links I find the most helpful. She has met other parents now, and knows she is not alone. What I realize now is how much more preparation I need to give parents who are not already familiar with the vaccination safety issue. I wish I could take away some of the mental pain she has experienced. Hopefully, I can save future parents some of that angst, and she forgives me for my ignorance.
I know in my heart that she will find solace in knowing she has done the right thing for her very healthy son, and be better prepared when she brings his little brother or sister into the world.

She is not done researching her decision yet, but that is the entire point of this whole situation....DO YOUR RESEARCH!!! Don't be swayed by fear and pressure to conform from either side. Those are not good reasons to make potentially life-altering decisions for yourself and your children.